Just a teaser.. nothing special..

Well its been quite some time since i've posted anything. There are 2 reasons for that. ONe is the normal writer's block where i ran out of interesting things in life to write about, well you can't blame me for lacking an adventurous side. I don't have the financial means to pursue such a life you know. Besides, its kinda nice sometimes to just relax and let life pass by. Secondly, i've been busy with my final year thesis. Well, actually, the reason i'm so busy with it is because the deadline is near and i've been slacking off more than i've ever been since i came into university. Yea yea.. i'm to blame for it.

Well, today i'm gonna post something that is very very uninteresting to all of you. Its the list of animes that I would like to watch. I would not list out the animes that I would like to own because the number of titles for that would be infinite. Yea i know i know, not many people can understand my obsession with anime and even more would not understand the choices of animes that i hold in high regard or i'm interested in. To me anime is not just entertainment or for kids. Anime is for me a form of art that is equal to films and books. Hence, that is why i feel agitated most of the time when i hear someone saying that they are 'cartoons'. To me, the term 'cartoons' are degrading to anime. Maybe i'll make a post to decribe the diffences in 'cartoons' and 'anime' by using examples from my little experiences of watching both 'cartoons' and 'anime'. Well, to make it very damn simple, 'cartoons' are mindless animated shows made by US production companies. 'Animes' are an art form depicting a story.

Well, yes, i agree that not all 'cartoons' produced in the US are mindless, but i dont consider them cartoons. I consider them animation, and the last US production of an animation that i deem worth watching ( excluding 3D animation, which are not 'cartoons' too) are the Matrix animation series, and before that 'The Lion King' which are both years apart. SOme of you may ask, wuts the difference between 'The Lion King' and lets say, "Cow and Chicken". Well there are obvious differences and i'll cover it sometime in the future.

Alrite, back to my original intent today. I actually managed to watch Shin Seiki Evangelion ( english translation: Neon Genesis Evangelion) and the End of Evangelion movie a few weeks back after waiting and searching in vain for numerous years. Well, I asked my friend to download the thing because i assured him it was damn worth it. To me it was superbly fucking damn worth it but... unfortunately my friend chastised the show in the end because i guess it wasn't suited to his taste. But wat the heck! I dont care because i loved it. Evangelion is the kind of anime that has the classic you either love/hate thing i guess. You either love it or you dont understand the end and you end up hating it. I of course loved it and its my Third most favourite anime in my list. Unfortunately Evangelion is just one in a long line of animes that I would want to watch.. So.. i'll list out some of the ones that I hope to watch in the near future, though they are arranged in no particular order and the list is by no means exhaustive.

• Super Dimensional Fortress Macross (Yea I saw it when i was a kid, but i wanna watch it again!)
• Rurouni Kenshin - Reminiscence (DO NOT REFER TO IT AS Samurai X!!!)
• Haibane Renmei
• Full Moon wo Sagashite
• Fruits Basket
• Furi Kuri (or alternatively FLCL)
• Kumo no Mukou Yakusoku no Basho (Place Promised in Our Early Days) first priority!!
• Rebuild of Evangelion (NOt yet released, haha. Basically an Evangelion Remake)
• Trigun
• RaXephon
• Vision of Escaflowne

Well the above is not much, because most of the animes that i wanna watch i've been able to watch them for the past 2 years!! HAHAHAHAHAH ... so its trimmed down a lot. But if your talking about the ones i would like to COLLECT!! wooo hooo.. its never ending..

Part 2 of Rantings and Answers

2) "what kind of girl i would create to be with me if i ever had the chance"?? wwuuuuuTTT???!!!

A Few days ago, I was talking to a girl on MSN. And she asked me.. what kind of girls do i like actually. OKay.. before I continue on, lets do a flash back and see how I met this girl. The parts coloured and in italic are the flashback parts

During my practical period in KL , a close friend of mine Girl M, introduced me to her best friend Girl A, with the intent of helping me to find someone haha. Well this finding someone thing i'll leave it for another day and another time to talk about k?. Back to the flashback - I met Girl A the first time at KLCC Kinokuniya when the three of us went out. She was really pretty.. Real nice girl.. After the first 2 times I instinctively knew that she was a good girl.

But somehow, I noticed that she wasnt the girl I was looking for. So I told my friend Girl M, intro her to another one of our friend la.. cos somehow i think they would both make a nice couple =).

-Flashback ended-

Okay FINE! I know that wasnt much of a flashback, was just trying to make things interesting =P. So i had a chat on MSN with girl A and she asked me wut kind of girl that I was looking for.

Then.. after thinking a while I told her.. that i was lookin for a girl who is (in no particular order or priority)

--- Quick-Witted --- Fast at catching things -- Intelligent (I dont mean grades, i mean naturally intelligent type) ----comfortable speaking either Hokkien/Cantonese + English --- outgoing, though not too much---feisty (yea i know, its crazy rite?) ---- mature when it matters-----understanding-- can rationalize but can let go and go crazy too --- thrifty----humble---- and most importantly KIND and NOT EVIL.

Girl A then asked me, did Girl M knew about all that criteria before she introduced me to her?.. Cos she said she isnt someone like that. Well... I dont know... But i'm not here to talk about that today.

Wut i actually want to talk about, are the criterias. HEHE.. a lof of people, after i told them of the criterias would say that i'm crazy and that i'm too picky myself. Sigh.. I have to agree to a certain extent that I am..

ANd I perfectly know and realize that I DON'T HAVE SUCH QUALIFICATIONS TO BE SO PICKY!.. but you cant blame a guy for seeing too far into the future rite?? sigh.... maybe thats something bad about me when setting these criterias. I set too far into the future. But what i want to clarify is gonna be explained below.

I told Girl A, that the criterias are just things written on paper or spouted out by my mouth. I wont follow those things strictly. Its impossible to find someone who fits that bill -(and even if I do, 9999 out of 10000 that girl will never like a guy like me). Right?? of course its right!

I'm just looking for someone who I could feel that 5 or 6 years ahead, I would still want to be with her and could still share a lot of things with her. The criterias dont mean fucking shit.. except for the Kind and NOT Evil part haha =). Which sane guy would want an evil and black hearted girl rite?

My friend once told me, "Dont think so much!.. Kau first then onli slow slow cook the feeling" ... Well, i really wish that I could hahah!... even if i could really brave myself to "court" the girl, I would definitely not be able to overcome the slow slow cook part. LOL.

Then.... one day I was watching Neon Genesis Evangelion.
Which I saw one of the characters in it, and she reminded me of the very girl that would suit my description. The name of the characer was Sohryu Asuka Langley

Well... She fit most of the first part of the description. Feisty, intelligent, quick-witted, fast at catching things. But she lacked the end parts of humble, kind, mature, etc. HAHAHA. but the fight in her is wut attracts me.

I think in my life, i've met quite a few people with the remaining characteristics that Asuka didnt have. But out of the many, only one made a special impression. She was the kind of girl that deep down i was looking for i guess. The moment i knew her was the moment that i knew wat kind of girl i was looking for, and wat virtues and values that really mattered to me. But thats over now haha..... to clear the air i'm still alone and i didnt really go after the girl. Impossible i guess. If you wanna know why i dont go after girls, head HERE
for an old post and scroll down to The Reason For Not Going......(Tuesday, June 14 2005 entry)

Well... if you've read till here, you may think that i'm writing stupid and silly stuff. And I agree with you fully =) gahahaha.

If i could create one... it would be a combination of Asuka and that girl. but... The last word is... I dont care about the criterias that i say i look for.. its all bullshit... IF the person comes along.. then she comes along =). It doesnt matter what her character is as long as she's a good person and i like her. And thats a fact!

What a silly post this is rite?? the confessionals of a lonely boy hahaha. Hope you readers had fun. hehe

Rantings and answers. Part 1

The clock on my computer is 5.42 am. Nope, it's not set to U.S Eastern Time. The digital clock is working perfectly.

I'm still sitting in front of my computer and still awake with a cup of coffee and some pastry - definitely not fresh - that I bought from 7 Eleven a while ago.

It has been like that since 2 weeks ago. "What the fuck are you doing?" you may ask. =) I'm asking that question to myself too. It seems that I just cant stop looking for things to read - and unfortunately I dont consider my academic books or journals as reading material- hence, for the past week or so I've been spending the bulk of my time watching anime, reading tons of things on Wikipedia and downloading Neon Genesis Evangelion fan-fictions to read.

I just finished around 70% of what I should prepare for my group presentation this Wednesday, which is just 24 hours away. And I have tons of other stuff to do.. sigh.

1) I have 2 chapters of my Final Year Thesis to finish in a fucking short 96 hours, which I dont have much of fucking idea how to.

2) I promised to help a friend do a first time grammar check on his Final Year Thesis, which I hope I can help with in the limited time frame.

3) I need to finish up some reports to hand up this Friday which is long overdue due to certain circumstances which, I admit, I have been part of the reason and I hope the lecturer doesnt kill me.

4) I need to prepare for the presentation this Wednesday, which is on a fucking morning. I dont know about you guys but most of the time I just hate waking up on mornings.

Sigh.. and I'm having a writer's block for this blog =)

Well.. this time i'll try to write something. As usual this is gonna be boring, cos it's about a boring guy ranting and grumbling. SO BEWARE AND DONT SCROLL DOWN IF U GET BORED EASILY.

1) Being ... Humble...

Ya know, not to say that I'm perasan or wut but... I've been praised and commented a few times by people that I'm humble. Hmm... was talking to a friend (if ur reading, u know who it would be =). Hint: pretty earings - they suit you very well and u look good wearing that outfit.. dont get angry ya? You know me, i'm an Idiot.) outside another friend's house last nite.

She commented on something, i forgot wat it is, that I'm just being humble..She isnt the first one to say that mind you, a few have said it before. Well.. i then explained to her that i'm not actually Maybe its just that I dont have anything to boast about. I'm not an angel or a gentleman entirely.

If i had the looks of another friend and the brains of another one of my friends here, maybe I would be boastful ya know. But i dont have both of it, so maybe that is why i cant boast =).Buy it? or dont buy it?.... Some of you may remember the ME in f1,2 and 3. I was a pretty big boaster at that time wasnt I? Haha.

But seriously.. in the end, if I ever start to boast about myself. PLEASE TAKE A FUCKING BASEBALL BAT AND BASH ME OVER MY FUCKING HEAD WITH IT!! AND THEN SHOVE IT UP MY ASS!!! I AIN'T NEVER WANT ME TO EVER BE BOASTFUL EVER AGAIN!. I HATE IT!!!!

And most important of all... I dont find that there is anything in this world that is worthy to be boasted about. IF you think your handsome, there are thousands who may be more handsome that you are, If your pretty, there maybe thousands who are prettier than you are. If you are smart, there maybe thousands who are smarter than you are. If your humble, there are millions more who are more humble than you are. If your rich, unless you are Bill Gates, you still arent the richest person in the world, and you may wake up a poor man next week. If you have a pretty gf/wife, its for you to take care and pamper her and love her, not show her to the world like a medal. The world is filled with people that are better than I am, and thats what keeps my feet to the ground.

TO all the people who ever praised me, mighty thanks to all of your. Really sincerely =) though i always feel i dont deserve it. But thanks for seeing in me something that i cant see and still refuse to see. May God bless you all!!

Holiday coming to an end....

Well.. a week of holiday has come to an end at last.

It has been a memorable week from start till finish. Things were mended, then broken again. Money was received, gambled and lost. Things just went full circle, some became a bit better some worse-off.

Oh well, it's just life =). Thats the way i guess, things come full-circle. Maybe one of the reason is because I believe that the the world doesnt owe us anything, its us who owes the world something.

Well, the one of the most ironic things to remember about this holiday, is sad songs. =). Sad, lonely songs. Had a few friends to share and embrace those songs for the past week..

Well just a short mumble today. Nothing much to write about. Maybe in the next few days something nice will come about and i'll write about it.

In anycase, in case anyone of you want me to write about something in secondary school, you can just leave a comment and i'll try to come out with something funny of it =).

Bonjour...

I'm Just Me.. and i hate hurting people

Yesterday night i got burnt by fire. And it hurt really, but i guess i'll just have to live with it till the fire forgets it and go away. But the problem was not about me getting burned. I got no problem with getting burned.

The thing that i care about is hurting or annoying or making someone i care about angry. I hate that feeling. Especially if its to someone important to me. That hurt the most to me.

I dont care what most people think about me, how they perceive me i just dont give a damn. But i care a lot about how people important to me perceive me. And i care even more about how i treated them, whether i made them happy, or angry or sad.

I feel happy when they are happy and i'm not when they are not. And it hurts especially when they are not happy or angry because of me.

It's Just Me.

Its turning out to be a gloomy day after all.......