Types of Attack (Courtships) a jokes look ^^

Well.. since I don't know why it seems like a courtship season now. Maybe seeing people doing courtship makes you wonder about yourself sometimes. HAHAHA... most probably its just seeing frens all over having partners or striving to get one adi. I guess being the odd one out isn't so bad after all. You get to be a free observer anytime you want!

Well the reason of this post is... erm... I suddenly thought of doing a humour look on the types of courtships( or modes of attack..) that a guy(or a girl) does to earn the love of the opposite sex. Bear in mind this is just a joke okay?? hehe .. for the amusement of those who has the same humour as I do. Hope it doesn't offend anybody though.

I got this idea when I reminiscenced a conversation I had with one of my friends about how he courted his gf.. So..

DISCLAIMER: If you cant take it as a joke.. don't read further!! and I am in no way an expert on this kind of stuff. As most of you who know me, knows my experience on relationships is VERY VERY LIMITED and was a long time ago. Heck its been almost few years since I was in a real relationship and I've only had one. And I don't think I'll be able to do anything like that either. So this is just for fun.

There are a lof of types of courtships we can classify. Those that I will present below are just what I could think of:

Type 1: Strategic Attack Tactics

This type of courtship is a well-planned step-by-step approach by the guy/girl to court his or her intended target. Outings and words are planned in advance with contingency plans for each and every moment.

Most used by individuals who are experienced in the art of courtship and are able to predict moves and counter-moves by the target and also competitors.

As of the moment I have not encountered any friends who are using this highly planned approach.

Type 2: Counter Attack Tactics

This type is actually where the person expresses his or her feelings first before the opposite sex does it ( of course feelings of acceptance la. rejection doesnt count).

The person would feel that the opposite likes him/her and therefore will ask for his/her hand first! hahahah

As of the moment, I only know of one who used this tactic before. Can't disclose it here =)

Type 3: Shock & Awe!!!

This is the most common type I've heard of! The person applies shock tactics to woo the his/her intended target.

This is done by .

(1) straight away in-ur-face expression of feelings. Hoping by some chance he/she is gonna strike it right and get the girl/guy.

(2) Arrange for a meeting or an outing alone with the intended target
and applying (1)

(3) Through electronic means (MSN, ICQ, IRC, phone) or traditional pen and paper and applying (1)

Type 4 : HOSTILE TAKEOVER!!!

Wow.. this one is dangerous. Do it at the risk of physical harm. As the name suggests, this involves courting a target who already has partner. In our layman terms, its called "using a spanner/crowbar and prying it off the cold hard fingers of another person"

This.. I leave it for you to decide the morality of it. I abstain from commenting.

Type 5: Friendly Merger

This one involves both parties wanting it to happen. In cantonese we use 3 words to refer to it. "Fai, Leng, Cheng" ( Fast, Pretty, Good).

No fuss, No waste of funds, No hassle.

But of course... who cares as you love each other rite??? heck .. I DONT MIND!



haha.. well only 5 types for now. So.. which one was yours or.. are yours.. or you prefer?? mind to share at the comment page?? don't be shy ler hahahahah!!! Maybe if you guys have any ideas to add to the above 5 feel free to suggest!